A letter to a homie.

Hi homie, do you still remember me homie, do you miss me homie? HAHA. I miss you homie. It has been awhile since we talked like last time, no more laughters like last time, every conversation was started by me and ended with a really cool tone.
I know, sometimes I deserve things like this happened to me as I was too picky on everything and my friends said. I was holding too strong to my self-concept and forgotten how's actually a relationship should be started.
A relationship should be started with both parties who have same interest in each other. I admit I have feeling to you by the time we spend together and hangouts, I was too focus on future too focus on things I thought I would want and ignore all of the good things happened around me. Well, there are not much to tell how I feel now and its not really matters what does matter is you are tired and feeling sick of everything and have moved on and there's no way the selfishness in me to drag you back to the hell. Lastly, I would say I do have feelings and was too late to find it out.

I can't describe how I hate my life right now. It's not right to blame it as everything comes with my own decision. There was once I heard people say ,'you get to choose the life you wanna live in', 'you're the only one to make your life happy'. I'm not living in the life I wanted and I never look forward to start a new day as I have to work in a mall and its fun at all to have this kind of schedule every day. 

I miss my study life, I miss everything back in diploma life as my only concern is on my grades and coursework. In contrast what's my concern now is on responsibility, it's sucks when you wanted to be responsible to everything though you're just a 'waitress' in a restaurant and what's the most terrible thing is weekends. I couldn't blame it because i chose to back to work in a restaurant but if I didn't change my mind to be that I think I would hate my life even more now! 

Life's hard,its full of decisions to make and every step must be taken carefully. I know this is just the beginning of the adventurous life journey, but isn't a successful event starts with a good beginning?