Bad things don't just come easily, but when they come they make sure they come in a group. Fluctuation of my mood makes me feel exhausted. I feel extremely happy for thing I shouldn't be and right after a minute I feel down because I know I'm fooling myself.
I tell myself that he actually has something on me, and right after I have the thought I feel like being fooled, by myself.
I tell myself, not to expect ,not to think, not to want anything from him but after that I will just sneak out to aim what is he doing, or what shirt does he wear today. I know the only solution is with me, I'm the only one who can make every suffocation goes away but the thing is I'm still hoping still wanting miracle to happen but in fact miracles only exist in fairy tales.
Strangled by emotional shits, and here come the importance of my life. My degree program. I thought I could enter the college I want and switch my course as my result is allowable. However, things don't just go smooth every time. I still need the confirmation from UK that whether I can study at their college and take the degree program of their University. Besides that, I just got to know that I have to repay my PTPTN student loan since I'm not studying for 6 months.
Previously I was worried about the tuition fees I'm going to pay for the degree and now I have to worry about the PTPTN. I work 8-12 hours per day just for my studies and I get to buy nothing to pamper myself.
LIFE YOU ARE LIKE A BITCH, TO ME. WHY EVERY BAD THINGS JUST COMES AT THE SAME TIME?
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